a pseudo-interview

Ever read an interview of a celebrity visiting a city and responding to an eager Page 3 journalist asking how he/she liked the city?
They always say 'it's a great city', 'oh! the food is great' and 'the people, they are very hospitable'.
What if it wasn't the case always?

J: Hi, so how do u like the city.
C: City? Which city? Oh, you guys call this city!!! Fine!
It's awful. I hate this place.

J: And how's the food here?
C: Don't get me started on that. I am dying of hunger since the past 3 days that I am here.
Even bread here is the worst I have seen. I am living on water.

J: And the people?
C: People!! People here look at me as if I am some alien dropped by a leaking space ship.
And the people, who walk past me, turn back and take a second look at me if my presence was an illusion.
And tourist spots, the so-called guide took me all the way atop a hill on foot and pointed to a small pebble the size of my ring and said it was a "History's Lost and Found" marvel.
And you call that - a 'place to visit'..!!!

J: So, are you planning to come back sometime?
( The journalist, being a novice in the field, had no choice but to ask all the questions in the book )
C: Yeah sure, when I have nothing better to do and am desperately waiting to experience the worst things of life.

May be there are such interviews, only to be dumped in thrash cans, never to be printed.
After all, the pride of cities is to be protected ;)

And no, I don't hate this city. Not as long as I get my favorite biryani at 2.00 AM. :)